as we all know we have become a community who dont really follow rules anymore. am talking about religion. im not so religious. and dont worry this is not about it. actually i woudnt know where to start. i just want to talk about something which has bothered me for sometime. going back to what i was saying about our generation, its obvious that almost 60 percent of the guys and girls have lost their virginity. and thats not what bothers me, its how we treat the people who get busted for it. dont get me wrong im not going to go on about how we shoudnt bust them. i just dont like how the blame is always put on the girl.
i still remember the first time i heard a story of a girl being pregnant and people finding about it. i remember thinking why wernt my mother and aunts not talking about the guy? they almost knew everything about the girl, her origins, where she lived, where she studied, what she studied, how old she was, when she got pregnant and the list went on. i knew i wasnt supposed to ask why they wernt talking about the guy cause i was little i wasnt really supposed to know anyway.
that happened when i was like seven, the world has changed. people have changed thats something alot of people get up on podiums and shout out loud but have we really? i mean if we talk about this, when was the last time, while talking about something like this, someone told you anything about the guy? or even mentioned the guy? ofcourse if its a friend of ours we`d say poor guy or talk about him but if it was someone we didnt know, oh yeah like seazan and niuma. all i heard was how badi niuma was (that as it maybe) no one talked about the guy, i heard someone say niuma should be stoned or something cause she was married but wasnt seazan too?
so i was thinking why guys actually get away with it more easily than the girls. well in a situation where the girl gets pregnant, the guy could just say it not his baby that would be one but a girl who was seeing only one guy, and everyone knew that, so why woudnt it be his baby? yeah theres always the possibility that she had sex with someone else, its a possibility. so if we consider that as an option why dont we entertain the possibility that the guy IS the father, which hello has more chance of being the truth.
i also thought about why our mothers talk about only the girl. maybe they didnt go out with our dads like we did? they dont know what many teenagers do these days? well they would know, just didnt do it so dont know the feeling.
"the feeling of just letting go, being totally into someone so much that rules dont matter, people dont matter, just that moment mattered, the pain before the pleasure mattered, and you dont think of consequences, you dont think you`d regret it, you dont think when things went to crap the person you love the most would leave you alone, so he could get away, take the easy road" - a friend
many mothers think that its the girls fault that the guy can do what he did. its a given that yeah the girl consented but the guy was there too. he should have "known better" too. maybe we can never make the old generation understand, i could live with that. what i dont like is how this generation, treat the unlucky ones. when they get busted its like, "wow i didnt know she was that easy to get under, the guy must be good". thats discrimination. isnt it? the girls easy, the guys an idol. and why go on and on about someone you dont even know about them having sex and getting busted when you do it yourself?
its forbidden to have sex for alot of good reasons, before marriage. maybe one of them is this. for a girl this humiliation, the betrayal, to be treated unfairly and most horrific of all not having any choice. in our society, to be labelled. for me i see two people, lost in passion, who promised alot of things to each other (them being true or not), who had the chance, the opportunity, and to me both consented, and the guy probably started, the girl would have resisted but its a moment where nothing else mattered. and when it happens we cant change it but we can change this attitude to not only blame the girl.
"I'm reckless and feelin' no pain
You know I've got no need to control
Livin' with the danger
I'm always on the edge now
With million dollar visions that I hold
Livin' like this never ever
Tore my life apart
I know how to maintain
And you know I know my part"
7 comments:
very true...
sex before marriage is a sin...
yet, most of us do it... but when the blame comes it's only the woman...
guess the guy never loved the gal...it was just lust...
if he did so...he wud have been there through the good and bad, happiness and sadness...
its like sometimes when it comes to doing the right thing we always step back.. because the right thing is always the hard thing to do..humans are a couple of pansies.. men in general..
Sad but true. Yet if the female individuals don't value their own body and welfare, it would be almost impossible to help them.
Maybe women should try to actually use their newly won RIGHTS to silently contemplate and find a way to act more reasonable and selfsufficiently.
Nature actually provides evidence that female species of all animals and plants are generally more self sufficient. Men r portrayed strong and less emotional but in reality they r more easy to manipulate than women.
Over the years men have won the psychological battle of superiority against women and it will remain so until women can come up with a better game plan than acting as parasites.
All humans are equal but men were created to cater for the needs of women. y do u think women crave for desires and fullfillment more often than men. (research show that women r more horny than men in general.)
women maybe more horny than men but women have the patience to keep it with them without doing anythin stupid, but most men (not all) just cant stay with their horniness....
n dream-nufenna, y was eve created for Adam? to fulfill his needs not the other way around
and most men are easy to manipulate, coz most of them dont have the courtosy to think before doing anything..which is somethin in us girls, which suys hate i guess...
if women were parasites, men are pests coz whatever parasiteness women have, all men ends up with women...except for the gay ones!
angel, i sense some anger towards my comment, which makes me assume u r feminine. i apologize for any inconveniences u may have felt from my comment.
but i have a strong feeling u misunderstood the real intention of my comment. sorry if i was unclear. what i tried to say was that women n men r equal and women should stop beleiving that they r the lesser gender.
angel, who ever said eve was created FOR adam. "Eve was created from adams backbone or bonemarrow." yet it does not mean its a physical thing it maybe a metaphore to suggest that she was made similar as adam or physically symetrical. so as to complete the Human gene stream. Hence they both are unlikely to survive without each other.
i was not suggesting females as natural parasites but referring to the acceptance of their suppressed state and living as weaker beings while they r really as important as males in nature.
sorry again for not being clear earlier.
Well, dream-nufenna, u were clear I just didn’t agree with u.
Maybe y don’t know the story of adam and eve. True that eve was created from adam’s backbone but she was created for adam as he was feeling lonely and sad. So I guess women were created for men dho.
Its not women who think that they are weak in gender, its mostly the society and to an extent men as well. When I read posts by men, most of the time it shows the faults in women, im not saying women don’t have any faults just that don’t always point at faults of women. Of women start, wow….wat posts will that be. I don’t have anything against guys coz I have a wonderful boyfriend. But im sick of guys throwing mud at women.
Im sorry if I was rude…I was just giving my opinion. The last of your comment was right, women r really as important as males in nature and in thinking as well.
Hahaha... Seems like Schmarty has bin puttin up a ruckus while i was bxy..
Good post schmarty..
This is one fucked up situation..
And the part abt women being hornier... ill hav to agree w/ dream nufenna..
BUT.. angel is correct in sayin tht women hav a higher threshold for sexual tension..
And Ill hav to say.. Men cant keep it in their pants.. n the more innovative of us always find sum way to seduce and fulfill our fleshlust..
Nythin to do with women being wanton and not value their bodies..
The biggest tool is the use of the now overrated and overvalued words 'i love you'.. Easiest way to get into a grls pants.. Sooner rather than later.. and most guys r now wise to this..
There is nuthin wrong with women...
Jus that Society has coerced women into an inferiority complex.. A society dominated by men..
Influenced by autocratic misogynist bullshit preached by women beatin sadists who hav to fill their pathetic misguided life with a sense of power and pride...
IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO;
And sex (true sexual intercourse, mind u..) is between two bodies..
The girl duznt hav to be cheap or sexually perverse and wanting..
Its actually a very strong physical expression of emotions... whether one is manipulated into it or just unchaste is another matter..
But more ppl are takin to the pleasure side of it rather than the emotional side of it...
Thts the problem..
In our society; couple get busted for illegitimate sex.. The guys a hero.. he got pussy.. hes the man.. he got the grl.. hes a god..
The grl is a slut.. a whore.. nuthin better than a street urchin.. Guys approach her askin for promiscuous sex.. Like its a fuckin brothel..
There one finds the misogyny in this society..
N its not only the old generation... evn the new generation..
N its gonna need a lot of time to get our societies mind set changed..
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